Day 37-42, Thursday-Tuesday, February 6-11, 2014

I really need to remember to update these on a more regular
basis, but the truth is that this has been just another boring,
snowy, icy, cold, week. I have been working on future video
projects and I have been excising my body a lot over the past few
days but other than that there's been nothing going on. I wish I had
more to say, but until the weather starts getting warmer I don't' think
there will be all that much to do around here other than the usual daily grind.

Day 31-36, Friday-Wednesday, January 31-February 5, 2014

So, I'm really glad that January is over. I mean nothing
amazing has really happened so far in February, but it's
a step up from where I was this time last month that's for
sure. So, let me just briefly recap the past few days.
I've been working on a lot of videos, including scripts for
the next few reviews and countdowns. I've been working on
getting live-streaming up and running, so I can make videos
from live-streams more often. I've played a new game called
Loadout that just became Free 2 Play on Steam. It's kinda
fun, it's like TF2 and Borderlands so I might make some content
on that. I've been hard at work getting Minecraft back up
on this computer, as I haven't played it since I switched last
year. I've played way too much League of Legends with my
friends, but that's ok. I've been trying to exercise more
often. I transferred my entire Pokemon collection from the past
3 years to Pokemon Bank, which took forever and a day. I've been
backing up all of my videos from the past 4 years, which has taken
forever and 2 days. I'm preparing for the 4th year anniversary special.
There's been way too much snow. Honestly, I think that's it. That's been
this week in a nutshell so far. Busy, but I like that. Peaceful, just the
way I wanted to start this year. I just wish things had gone as planned
from the start.

Day 27-30, Monday-Thursday, January 27-30, 2014

Another arctic blast. Yeah, I guess that would be a good
way to describe the past few days. I feel bad that I haven't
really had much to write about this month other than... death
I guess. Kinda depressing, but my life never was the most glamorous.
Regardless, the winter months are always slow. Not much to do, not
many places to go. I'm really hoping things pick up in the spring.
I know that my grandmother will be staying with us for at least a
month when we have the memorial service for my Pap-pap. Honestly, I
just don't have anything to really talk about... nothing special happened
these past few days. Sorry if that's a bit of a let down. Maybe tomorrow I'll
do a look back on this month and talk about goals for February.

Day 23-26, Thursday-Sunday, January 23-26, 2014

Another batch of rather monotonous days. I've got nothing special to say about Thursday and Friday. Saturday, however was another one of those depressing days. I spoke with my grandmother on Saturday, and she told me that the family received my grandfather's ashes back. He served the U.S military in the 50's and was stationed in Japan, so he was given a golden urn. Hearing that just brought me back down a bit deeper this dark state I've felt trapped in this past month. And then I heard of the passing of JewWario shortly after which was just as depressing for me and so many other people. Sunday was spent just taking in the events of the weekend. Like I said, I'm just sort of trapped in a depressed state for the moment that will pass with time. Add on the the fact that it's winter, and we're snowed in again with no hope in sight of warmer temperatures and you have a sad Lightning.

Day 22, Wednesday, January 22, 2014

So I think today was the most productive day I've had since the beginning of the year. I woke up really early today and just decided that I'd get a lot done. I worked on videos for nearly 9 hours, between rendering, recording both video and audio, and I even started working on the next script for the next countdown. And speaking of countdowns, I finally released my Top 5 Games of 2013 video. I think it went over well enough. Hopefully I can make tomorrow turn out the same. I have a plan for tomorrow. I finally want to get up and start walking again. You see about 2 years ago I really screwed up my one ankle to the point where they think it needs surgery. Well, I'm scared of the surgery option so I'm going to try everything in my power to avoid that. So tomorrow I want to grab my crutches, get out of this wheelchair that I've been bound to for almost 2 years, and finally get active again before I develop other complications from inactivity. Hoping that goes well. Only time will tell. But I really want to be up and moving for when I see my grandma, aunt, uncle, and cousin in the spring. We'll be having a memorial service up here in PA when they arrive in the spring for Pap-pap, since he didn't want one down in Florida. So that's my goal. There isn't that much to do in winter anyway, might as well spend the time getting built back up.

Day 21, Tuesday, January 21, 2014

So today was another normal day. Nothing big happened today.
I worked for hours on a new video countdown and played a
bunch of League of Legends. I also spent a bit of time with
my family this evening just talking and sharing stories and
jokes. But all in all a pretty normal day. I'm really proud
that I was able to get this video done. I can't wait to see
what everyone thinks when I upload this tomorrow afternoon!

Day 16-20, Thursday-Monday, January 16-20, 2014

No, I haven't forgotten about this. It's that I really didn't have
much to say the past few days. It was all the same stuff, just feeling
sad and playing games to ease the pain. Lots of League of Legends, TF2,
and Pikmin 3. I'm starting to feel better about things, and I'll probably
get back into video making sometime in the next day or so.
I'm sorry this update sucked but I felt it would be a bit
redundant to just write the same stuff for nearly a week
straight.

Day 13-15, Monday-Wednesday, January 13-15, 2014

I suppose the saying death comes in 3's holds true here.
I'm just going to group up the past 3 days into one as the
same events from the last week, as well as one new event hold
relevant for all 3 days. Timmy passed away on the 14th. He
never made it to his appointment. He was a great cat, and I'm
really going to miss him. We grew up together. But I suppose
life must go on. I'm ready to move on, I'm ready for all of
these negative feelings to leave so I may try to pursue the plans
I had for this new year, as the ones who passed would have wanted me
to do. That's really all I have for this, I'm just kind of tired of
talking about this. I just feel like I've been writing the same things
for different people this week so I don't have anything new to write.
I loved them all the same and all differently. There can't really be
much more said.

Day 11 & 12, Saturday & Sunday January 11 & 12, 2014

I honestly can't believe this is happening. With everything
that has happened to me and my family this week, I just can't
believe this is real. Almost right out of nowhere, my
grandfather passed away today. It began a few days after
Christmas. He had fallen and broken his hip, I believe I
talked about this a few days ago. They surgically healed it,
then sent him home with no rehabilitation, because my
grandfather refused it. On Saturday, yesterday, he began
having trouble breathing. Turns out, all the stress from
the previous issue was too much for his heart and he wasn't
getting enough oxygen. That was Saturday. Sunday morning,
he was rushed to the ICU of the hospital he was staying in
after having worsening breathing issues. It was then, that his
heart stopped the first time for 10 minutes. About an hour
after being stabilized his heart stopped again. This time he went
15 minutes without oxygen before being revived again. However,
if your brain goes a total of 25 minutes without oxygen, you would
most certainly be pronounced brain dead. That is what happened this
afternoon. At this point, he was only being kept alive by
machines. He was completely brain dead. At 3:35 PM EST,
Sunday January 12, 2014 he was declared dead at the age of 80,
after being removed from the machines that were
only preventing the inevitable.

I feel for the past 10 days I've been trapped in a never
ending nightmare. First Great Aunt Nina, then Timmy's
health issues (still ongoing), and now this. I've hit my
breaking point. I've probably come off as a whiny brat all
day to people on twitter and all of my friends but I don't
know what to do anymore. If you get anything from all of this,
value your life and others. Things can change at any second, and
just keep going, as I learned this week.

Timmy's appointment is tomorrow. It could go 1 of 3 ways,
they fix him (unlikely but I hope this happens), they tell us
there is nothing they can do and we can take him home to live the
rest of his days, or they can put him down. It's not over yet.
How can this hell not be over yet?!

I'll talk more about memories with my grandfather in coming days, right now
I just can't. I'm still in partial shock. And I really just can't. I feel sick right now.
I just need to stop writing this for today... I'm sorry.

Day 10, Friday January 10, 2014

Sad to say, Timmy is about the same. However, he is going
to be seen by a vet on Monday. I will make sure of that.
The temperatures are going up and by then we should be able
to get out easily.

I'm going to try to stray away from the negative that's been
going on during this past week. Yes, it has been a full week now
of this. So, today I started playing Kid Icarus and Pikmin 3.
Now I did play Pikmin 3 before, but never finished it. I plan to
fix that. I also played with some friends last night and we had
a... sort of... good time in League of Legends. Although, when
I'm already feeling horrible enough this week it would be nice
if people didn't point out every screw up I make. I mean it's just
a game. But what are you going to do?

Tomorrow should be more of the same. I feel horrible about
the lack of videos on my channel, but honestly if I made
videos feeling this way I don't think they'd be worth watching.
If you can tell the creator is depressed and not having fun,
why should you have fun? I'm sure my viewers will understand.
This isn't another huge break like last year. Just a very
sad and rough patch for me right now.

Day 8 & 9, Wednesday & Thursday January 8 & 9, 2014

This will be another short update. Nothing has changed in
almost a week. My cat Timmy is still really sick, the
weather is still awful and I can't get out of the house
to get him to a vet. My parents don't even want to bother
with the vet, as they've seen this before and know there's
nothing they can do. I'm not completely convinced. I just
wish the weather would clear so I can get a professional
opinion. If I take him to a vet and THEN they say there is
nothing medical science can do for him, then fine. At least
then I can say I tried, and I'll just do whatever I can
for Timmy to keep him happy and confortable until the end.
But if I take him and they say they can help and maybe save his
life then that's great! But I can't let him go that easily
without knowing. Timmy hasn't eaten in days, I've tried everything.
So, the fact that he's still holding on even in this horribly weakened
state means that I shouldn't give up on trying to save his life.
Unfortunately, the weather doesn't look like it will clear until
Monday. That has me nervous, but I'll take things as they go.

Day 6 & 7, Monday & Tuesday, January 6 & 7, 2014

No, I didn't forget about you guys. I just really didn't want
to sit down and write out what I have to say.

Gonna combine two days into one here. You'll probably see
me do this quite a few times. This first week has been
awful, just plain and simple. On Monday, my oldest cat
Timmy started getting sick. Now he's at the point where
he can't eat or won't eat I can't figure out which, barely
drinks, and can barely walk. He just wobbles around the
house and eventually falls over. Now I'd love to get him
to the vet, but I can't because we're iced and snowed in.
Because for whatever reason, the district rarely cleans
our street in these winter events. So I can't even get
him any medical treatment for another few days. And if I
took him out in these subzero temperatures, that would kill
him. That would be the end. Add on to the fact that the
funeral for Great Aunt Nina was Tuesday, and I've had it.

Honestly, I don't know what else to say. My great aunt is
gone. My best friend is dying. I know he's a cat but he's
still my best friend. I got him when I was just 5 years old
so he's just about 16 years old now. I just hate to see
him in this state. I don't know if he's suffering but I
really hope he isn't. Because other than trying every hour
to get him to eat something or anything, and making him
as comfortable as I can make him, it's out of my hands.
Just the thought of losing someone else in the same week,
I can't handle it. That's about all I have to say. Expect
tomorrow's to be more of the same. Expect most of the days
from this point until this problem blows over to be the same.

Day 5, Sunday January 5, 2014

So today was a little more interesting. Not by a whole lot
but still interesting. Backstory time! So remember how I
said a C.C and I hung out New Years Eve and Day? Well, we
usually give each other Christmas presents then... however
his gifts hadn't arrived by then. So he came back today and
we were able to give him his gifts. Then we spent a lot of
time talking about Pixar movies. Mostly Monster's University
and Brave. Either way, it was very enjoyable because I'm a
huge Pixar fan so I'll talk about those movies anytime.

After that, it was the usual video editing. I don't expect
tomorrow to be productive. And Tuesday is the funeral so don't
expect me to be super happy that day. Either way, I expect another
average I don't know what will happen day for tomorrow!

Day 4, Saturday January 4th, 2014

A rather small update today, as not too much went on today.
Today was a depressing kind of day after yesterday's news.
But I did get a few videos completed and I did play a lot
of ranked in League of Legends with my friend TJ. And I
climbed my way to Bronze 2. On the road to Silver. Honestly
that's about it. Sorry but I'll probably have some days like
this where nothing really exciting happens. Either way, I'll
see you back here tomorrow.

Day 3, Friday Jaunuary 3, 2014

What can I say about today other than the fact that it
was a rather sad day. The day was relatively calm, up
until 6pm when my family received a call telling us
my Great Aunt Nina passed away earlier in the day.
We did see it coming, I mean she was 95 years old and
was suffering from severe dementia and had recently just
fell and hit her head. That still doesn't' make the news
any easier to swallow. I was pretty depressed most of
the day. I'm also worried that we won't be able to make it
to the funeral on Tuesday. You see we're in the middle of
that winter storm I'm sure you've heard about. And with
a family where all 3 members have some form of a physical
handicap that makes life hard because we can't clear the snow
and fall easily on the ice. Not to mention the high temperatures
have been barley breaking 0 degrees. So not being able to
make it Tuesday would devastate me... But as per my New
Years resolution I"m trying to look on the positive side.
Maybe something will work out.

From this point on, I'd like to take the time to talk about
both my Great Aunt Nina and my Great Uncle Skip (who passed
in Dec '09). They were both a huge part of my life. Both sets
of my real grandparents live in Florida, which is nearly
1000 miles away. I would see them 1 a year if I was lucky.
So to have both Aunt Nina and Uncle Skip living near us, was
life having a 3rd set of grandparents. They were here for
EVERY holiday I can remember. Easter, Christmas, Halloween.
Uncle Skip would take me out trick or treating every year
when I was very little. Aunt Nina would help me out every
Easter when we'd dye the eggs so I wouldn't make a mess,
again I was very little. My Uncle Skip was a veteran in World War II.
Aunt Nina was a school teacher back in the 30s, 40s, 50s, ect.
She taught my grandfather ironically enough.
She made my mother's wedding gown because no gowns would fit my mother
because of her leg braces. My Uncle Skip was a major collector and
I have fond memories of him and I collecting quarters for his quarter
collection... which he gave to me to keep and continue shortly before
his passing. I could go on and on about all the memories I have
with Aunt Nina and Uncle Skip. They've always been here for us...
And I'm really going to miss them both.

I would go on with this but honestly I"m having a hard time seeing
past all the tears in my eyes to continue. I hope to make tomorrow a
little brighter. They're both an inspiration for me. They've always
wanted nothing but good for me. I want to be like them, I want
to be remembered like them when my time comes. Someone who was a
light in the darker hours. I think I've found my inspiration to
just continue to become stronger as the years go on.

Day 2, Thursday January 2, 2014

At the end of today, I'm glad I can say I made it a productive one. Nearly every hour of my day had something for me to do today. Starting with the writing process for the script of my first video
countdown of 2014, a recording with a very good friend of mine (you know who you are) and you'll see that at the end of the week I'd assume. Followed up with a MASSIVE Terraria and League
of Legends gaming session, and ending with editing all of the videos I've recorded for the next week. That is WAY more than I'd usually get done in a day and I really hope I can continue to keep on going with the same workload.

I wish I could say the whole day was good, however I did receive some bad news. About a week ago, my grandfather fell and broke his hip. They did surgery and said he'd need to be in rehab
for at least a month. However today they sent him home with NO rehab at all, because he would not consent to doing so... So, now my family is very stressed and very worried about his
possible declining health both physically and mentally. So, as far as that whole situation is concerned I'm not sure how it will turn out, but I pray for the best.

All in all, I was glad for the busy but relaxing day. I don't really have much planned out for awhile so I'd imagine most of my upcoming days will be like this. Either way, today was mostly nice.

Lightning Logs: Day 1, Wednesday January 1st, 2014

So, it's that time of year again. That time when the slate is wiped clean and a fresh start can begin! I personally have a lot of high expectations and hopes for the year up ahead, and I
couldn't be more excited. For those who don't know who I am, allow me to introduce myself. For the past 4 years I have run a YouTube channel called TheLightningspirit78, now called
Lightning Plays, so most people call me Lightning. I am a girl, 20 years old. In 1993 I was born with a condition called Spina Bifida, and it is a handicap I've lived with for all my life.
I've experienced a lot of things in my life, some good, some bad. I've been through things some people wouldn't even be able to fathom but at the end of the day these experiences have made
me stronger as a person! Now for the past few years of my life, I have battled a lot of health issues and a lot of depression. Events that have really affected my life for the negative and
have caused me to have a negative outlook on life. This is where the new year comes in. I want to change my life for the better again. 20 years old is an exciting time to be alive, a time
where new and exciting things are on the horizon. I want to see what life has in store for me. I want to start making a change. So for the next year, I plan to make a sort of log on my experiences.
I plan to talk about just about anything that comes to mind. I feel that if I have something like this driving me to do something each day, it will give me more of a reason to continue to
reach higher goals as the months go on. I hope the journey is interesting and blessed with good health and fortune. And I hope you enjoy reading this as time goes on. Welcome, to the Lightning Logs.

So, what happened today? Well, I suppose this warrents a bit of explination. For those of you who have seen my videos, the name Christian Cosplayer would sound familiar (I'll refer to him as C.C most
of the time). My family and his family go WAY back. Both of our mothers grew up together as friends, and ever since we were both 2 years old, C.C and I have gotten together on New Year's Eve and
New Year's Day to ring in the year. It's one of the few traditions my family has and I look forward to it each year (sometimes more than Christmas). So, as you would expect, we spent the day
together today playing games like Pikmin 3 and Super Mario 3D World. It was a wonderful time! C.C is very into musicals and theater so we watched a show called Twisted which he showed me from YouTube.
It was the untold story of Jafar from Aladdin, and most of it was a massive parody on both the film and the events of Pixar and Disney's squabble from the early 2000's. You'd have to see it...

But they have now gone home and I hope to see him again soon. We usually only see each other each New Year with a few exceptions. I hope that is different this year but I know that college and work
get in the way of a lot of things and I can completely understand that. Regardless, the holidays are over now and I can get started with the new year. I have a lot of ideas that I want to work on for
videos and I really want my channel to grow and expand in ways I've never thought possible before. But only time will tell. Anyway, I'm starting to get tired and the clock is nearing midnight. I'll
be back here tomorrow! Before I leave, I would like to thank Josiah Clark for the idea. He sent me a message on Skype a few weeks back thinking that this would be good for me! Maybe someday soon, I'll
forgo the written way and just make videos but for now I'm content with this.